Secretes of goal setting for achieving happiness

It’s time for new year resolution!

I will write about how to set goals that lead us to genuine happiness.

First of all, we need to know that a goal is different from a purpose.

Purpose is like a theme, the reason why we want to do things.

A goal is a concrete step to make it happen.

We must be careful not to make goals a whole purpose.

When goals become our purpose, we would be preoccupied with achieving things.

This mind-set is driven by fear.

We will then set ourselves to be trapped in an endless cycle of seeking happiness outside ourselves.

For example, for me my purpose is to be true to myself and fully enjoy my life.

I imagine what it is like for me to “fully enjoy my life” and then make plans for my various activities to actualise my purpose.

This is a goal.

Successful goal setting for achieving happiness requires that our way of life (purpose) and our daily activity are consistent.

The first step is thus to verbalise your purpose.

Next step is to make concrete plans, but just thinking about action plan often doesn’t work.

If we really mean to set goals that lead us to genuine happiness, we must clarify what gets in the way for us to become happy.

So the second step is to clarify what gets in the way and let it go.

Please reflect on the following aspects of yourself:

1. self-image
2. relationships
3. work and environment

Write down the repetitive patterns of your thinking, feeling and behaviour which you think hinder you from achieving greater happiness.

Please also write down things that you do but you actually don’t want to do.

As an example…

• your current work
• responsibilities
• even small things like washing dishes and attending meetings you actually don’t want to go

Once you clarify things that you don’t like to do, just make up your mind quitting all of them that you believe don’t make you happy!

Let it go!!

I recommend that you write down your thoughts on paper when you do this exercise. 

Seeing your thoughts written on paper makes this process a lot more powerful and effective!

OK, the third step is to vividly imagine what it is like to be when you let go of your old unwanted patterns.

This part is to set concrete goals.

What action does it involve to let go of things you have named earlier? 

Think about concrete actions.

For example, for me, my thought that I am not confident of myself holds me back at times. 

So I will thoroughly stick to my attitude that I will do what I love to do, ignoring whether or not I am approved, or how much I think I can do.

I will start with an affirmation that “I will do the best I can with my whole heart. Please allow me to offer everything I can.”

As a concrete plan, next year I will run a seminar that I started this year in other cities.

I let myself vividly imagine that I am having a great time with audience in other cities, and that a seminar will bring us together.

When imagining the future, the key is to find a feeling place where your goal is already realised. 

Try to feel real by thinking about what it would be like to have your goal realised.

You may say I am a dreamer~

(Don’t say that, John Lennon….)

This process will excite you.

I think that this “dreaming” “imagining” time is actually very important.

We can only actualise things that we can imagine in our head.

Letting go of old negative patterns and imagining new patterns need to be done together.

They are two sides of the same coin.

We would feel defeated if we only focus on negative patterns which are persistent and hard to let go.

It helps us to find the opposite emotions in the face of negativity.

Please feel free to contact me if you get stuck!

Let’s build a kind of life that what matters for us is truly valued.

Have a wonderful 2018!